How to Use Nicknames in Relationships



Posted: Monday, September 14, 2009

by Caitlin Class
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I will never forget the first time my husband called me by a pet name. I had been waiting for my then boyfriend to address me as something other than my first name for a couple months, but for some reason, I guess I was expecting something a little more flirtatious than "snookums." Oh well, I have more than returned the favor with all the accidental girly pet names I have called him- "doll" to name the least. Truth be told, there is a lot more to the proper use of pet names than we realize. Pet names are generally used to show appreciation and love for another individual, however, there are certain names that should be avoided and then there are those that practically everyone gladly accepts. The trick to using a pet name is understanding which names get your loving message across and which ones will just offend, annoy or disrespect your significant other.

The Pet Names Guys Don't Like. Men really are not as dumb as TV sitcoms make them out to be. If you are calling your man by a patronizing, little boy's nickname in an effort to get him to do some chore for you, there will be two results. First of all, he won't appreciate the use of a condescending nickname, like "bud," "champ," or "stud," and he will be less interested in giving you the help you need. Men like to be called by names that make them feel hot and needed, like a rugged, yet classy night in shining armor. Males do not care to be called nicknames that just sound childish or girly (i.e. "doll," "pookie" or "cutie"). In some cases, men don't even like to be called a pet name if it is the same one you use to address the rest of the world. As one couple mentioned, the husband used to appreciate when his wife called him "sweetie," but then he realized she called virtually everyone she came into contact with "sweetie." The husband thought the nickname was overused and it began to lose any meaning in their relationship.

The Pet Names Girls Don't Like. While men may have some preferences about which nicknames they like, woman usually like whatever name their significant other calls them, so long as it is not "chick," "girl," "woman," or, my personal favorite, "dude." As one woman said, "I am not your ho nor am I your bro, so call me by a real lady's nickname." Women generally do not like being called sleazy or masculine sounding pet names. The most common complaint among women, however, is not in the actual pet name they are called, but in who is calling them by that name. It makes women feel cheap or like a toy if someone they are not seriously involved with refers to them as "babe" or "sexy."

The Names We All Love. The truth of the matter is that men liked to be called a name that sounds masculine, hot, or just has a loving resonance to it when it leaves their woman's mouth. Similarly, women like to be referred to by a name that sounds delicate, beautiful or sexy. The names that could be called unisex pet names include the following: "babe," "hun," "honey," "sweetie," and "baby." In addition to the unisex, standard list of names we all love, men also like to be called "big daddy," or "sugar." Women also love to be called "angel" or "darling."

All in all, pet names are a great way to show someone you care about them. They should be used on a regular basis with the one you love, but try to mix it up a little. Make some of your own names up, sometimes those come out to be the best ones! I know a man who calls his girlfriend "honey dip." She loves it. You never really know, so just give these standard names a try and if they don't fit, make up your own and see what sticks. Just don't go calling your sugar daddy "baby doll" or the woman of your life "big mamma."

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Courtney Lewis is the manager of the Sweetly You Bath and Body Boutique, where you can create unique bath and body gifts. Follow the link to learn more about our most recent venture, the bath and body store, Sweetly You.
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